Sunday, November 1, 2009
The 6 Greatest Action Films of All Time
This movie is so painfully awesome. This movie is about the year 2018, which you can tell because everything is written in Lady Starlight font. Also, everyone loves this game Rollerball, where the only rules are that there are lots and lots of confusing rules... and motorcycles.
This is basically a frame for frame remake of the original, but the year that it takes place in is 2005. Almost all science fiction remakes take place at later times than the originals, but the producers thought that we were much closer to achieving our Rollerball future than initially anticipated. I guess the producers told a bunch of scientists, “when can you get me a Rollerball filled future”, and the scientists said, “At the rate we are going, hopefully within 2 years”, and then the producers said, “Well, we'll make the film take place in 3 years just to be safe. We don't want this film to be embarrassingly inaccurate.”
4-The Greatest Game Ever Played
So when I went to see this movie twice, I was all excited for another Rollerball remake. This movie is actually not about Rollerball at all. Its actually about golf, making this movie the most misleading title since Life is Beautiful. Seriously, this movie should be called: “The Stupidest Fucking Game That Has Ever Been, For Lack of a Better Term, Played, and It Has Nothing to Do With Rollerball, Which is an Awesome Sport/Movies”. After I saw this movie, it made me just run out and watch Rollerball again, which is why its on this list, because I wish more movies made me watch Rollerball.
3-The Shawshank Redemption
2-Sorry, I thought there were six greatest action films, but there is only five. So now you should reread the list thus far while subtracting 1 from each ranking.
And the #1 greatest action film of all time is...